Friday, December 26, 2008

Happy Holidays!

I haven't had much time for blogging ever since Mom bought her bead shop.

Now that she is gone a lot during the day (and sometimes at night, too) I have so much more to do here at the house! I have to patrol, and watch for bad squirrels, and bad cats, and those crazy people that keep walking around and around the neighborhood (don't they know they are just going in a big circle, getting nowhere?)

Sometimes Mom takes me to the shop with her, but please don't tell anyone, because I am not supposed to be there. Mom says the landlords don't approve of dogs - have you ever heard anything so ridiculous?

So here is how I am spending the holidays:
Here's my best smile!

And here's me taking a nap with my new Christmas Baby, while Mom works on the computer.
Hope your holidays were great!

Sunday, August 31, 2008

Mom took me on a trip!

I got really upset a couple of weeks ago, because mom started packing her suitcases, and that usually means she is going away, and leaving me at my doctor's office. So I paced around a lot, and acted really squirrely (according to Mom), and then the next morning, she put the suitcases in the car, and I kept blocking her way, and then jumping in and out of the backseat. Then she told me to go get my leash, which is fun for me, but I was still suspicious. But I got my leash, and got in the car, and off we went.
And we drove and drove and drove a really long way, and I forgot all about being nervous, and Mom stopped one time and got French Fries and we shared them. I LOVE French Fries!
Then we stopped along side of the road, and Mom got me out of the car so I could pee, and then we just played beside the car for a while, and then this really nice lady in a really big car pulled up, and talked to my Mom, and then we got back in the car and followed her. And we drove straight up a mountain, and then we stopped at a house, and climbed up a lot of stairs, and at the top of the stairs there were 2 other dogs!
And those dogs barked and barked and barked at me!
But they were really nice dogs - I think we just surprised them.

One of them was a tiny puppy named Kuda. Kuda likes to play all the time, and she kept stealing my Baby. I got really tired of that, even though I was a guest at her house, so I finally started stealing her Babies! Her babies were smaller than mine, and I shook them really hard, but she still played with mine!
The other dog was Tai, a really nice cocker spaniel. Tai doesn't like toys; she only likes food and bones. She stole all my bones, and kept trying to steal my breakfast! But Mom always made sure I got all my breakfast, and Mom snuck me some bones when we went to bed at night.

Kuda had a toy box just like the one I have at home, and it was really hard for her to get her toys out of it, because she is so little. But it was easy for me to get them out of there!

Kuda always tried to get me to play with her. Sometimes I was too tired.

Kuda's Dad liked to play tug of war with me, so we did that a lot while Mom was gone during the day. We watched TV, too. I love TV!

This was my chair on vacation. It wasn't nearly big enough for me, and to make it worse, Mom would sit it in when she got home, and then I would have to get up in the chair and share it with her, 'cause I like sitting with my Mom, but we really needed a bigger chair!
I really liked the vacation I took with my Mom! But I was glad to come home to my bed and my toys!

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Cone? What cone?

Before we went on vacation, Mom and I went out in the yard to play, and she was really surprised when I showed her that I can still play soccer, even though I was still wearing the cone on my head.

I could still pick up the ball, and run fast, and Mom still couldn't catch me!

I need a new soccer ball, don't you think?
I'll show you what I did on vacation next time!

Tuesday, July 29, 2008


I'm pretty sad - can you tell?

I got bitten by a bug on my back leg, and then I kept scratching it and licking it (because dog licks make everything better!), and I must have been scratching and licking too much, because Mom finally looked at it, and found 2 big sores, and now I have to wear this stupid hat.

And you know how I feel about hats!

I especially hate this hat. I bump into doorways and furniture, and when Mom throws me treats, they bounce off the outside of it. And Mom calls me a "Conehead". Good grief.

Mom is putting medicine on my leg, which is stupid, because if she would just let me lick it, it would get all better!

Notice how I plop down on her jewelry stuff and her computer desk - that'll show her!

This picture show me when I heard the thunder! We have been having a lot of bad thunderstorms, and the thunder is even louder inside this hat.

Please tell my Mom to get me out of here!


Monday, July 28, 2008

I Love Caterpillars

This is my caterpillar Baby. I have had it for a really long time.

It has a tennis ball in its tail.

It used to have one in its head, but I got that one out!

When I play with my Caterpillar Baby, I grab it by its tennis ball tail, and fling it around and around.

This makes its body get stuck on my nose, and then I can't see!

But I leave the body on my nose, and keep playing, 'cause it it fun!

When I am through, I put my head down and go into my Baby trance.

Sometimes I sit like this for a really long time!

Saturday, July 5, 2008

Bang Bang!

Yesterday was a horrible day!

It started off OK - Mom and I slept late, and then we snuggled in bed. I am a good snuggler!

Then, Mom went to work, and I was alone for a while.

Then, Mom came home, and we played soccer until it started thundering and lightning, and raining. It was a bad storm, so I got in bed with Mom so she wouldn't be scared.

But then the rain stopped, and right after that the bad stuff started!

Right outside our bedroom window, our terrible next door neighbors started making the bad bang bang noises they make every summer. It only happens on one day, but that is a horrible day for me!

I have to find a safe place to hide from the bang bang noises! But I have to be near Mom, because I am so scared, and I want to make sure she is OK. So I ask Mom to open her closet, and I go in there and stay for hours, until it stops.

It always lasts a really long time.

Mom tries to get me to come out and sit with her on the bed, but that is too close to the noise.

The bang bang noises finally stop, and I come out of the closet, but I will not go outside, because they might start again! So I can't go potty again until it is daylight, but that is better than getting caught outside with the bad noises!

When Mom came home from work today, I got a new bone!

I chewed it really fast. Now it is gone.

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Happy Father's Day

I want to wish a Happy Father's Day to all the great dads out there!

This is how I am spending today - snoozing on my piggy baby. Babies make great pillows!

Have a fun day, however you spend it!

Saturday, June 7, 2008

It is too hot to blog

I'm sorry folks. I know I haven't blogged in a while, but it is very very very hot here, and I mostly lie around on top of the air conditioning vents, and rest. You probably noticed that I am wearing a long red fur coat, and so I try to shed as much as possible, but it is still pretty hot under here.

About a week ago, before it got so hot, Mom and I played a pretty good game of soccer outside.

Here is my patented "sneak defense." Mom never sees this one coming. I sneak right past her on my tiptoes.

This is me running super fast. Mom can never catch me.

I don't even try this now, though. It is 100 degrees every day!
I stay inside waiting for Mom to get home from work, then I go outside to do my business, and Mom and I go to the mailbox to get the mail, and then we both collapse on the bed!
We will never make it to August at this rate!

Monday, May 26, 2008

I'm Home Again!

And I stink!

Mom took me to my doctor's office and I had to stay there for a long long long time. Sometimes she does that. I don't know why, but I missed Mom a whole lot, even though there are a lot of nice people there that play with me and take me for walks outside.

I knew something was up when I saw Mom packing her suitcase. Lots of time when she packs a suitcase I end up at the doctor's office.

Then, to make things worse, the day before Mom came and picked me up, they gave me a stinky bath! Doesn't anybody understand how hard I worked to get back my good doggie smell? Now I have to start all over again!

Mom is all confused this morning because I keep trying to take Baby outside with me. What she doesn't know is that the nice ladies at my doctor's office ALWAYS let me take Baby when I go outside, because they don't have dumb rules like Mom does. So Mom and I have had several arguments this morning, but I had to finally let her win, because she is the boss of me.

Speaking of dumb rules, look what I did last night!
When I went outside, I saw my soccer ball! I had almost forgotten about my soccer ball, and I was so excited! Mom was inside taking some dumb old pictures, so I played with my ball for a few minutes outside, but that was no fun, so I took it inside to try to find Mom. She didn't see me, so I took the soccer ball to the bedroom, and played on the bed for a long time. It was a lot of fun! Mom finally came in, and started loading her pictures into the computer, and she still didn't see the soccer ball! When she finally saw it, she said "Bailey..." in that low deep voice that means I shouldn't have done something, but then she started taking pictures, and even played inside soccer with me a little. And then she made me take the ball back outside.
I am glad to be home again!

Thursday, May 8, 2008

Taking Mom for a Walk

I was so happy today! Mom came home from work early, and she took me for a walk. I love to go for walks. Walks are the best!

This pictures shows me dancing around Mom's legs, carrying my leash, because I am so excited.

Now I am standing by the front door, patiently holding my leash, all ready to go. But Mom can't find the key to the door, so I will helpfully walk back and forth from the door to the kitchen over and over until she finds the key. This time-tested technique has never failed to turn up the key in the end.

Now I am all but dancing on my back legs by the front door. I really do make a big deal out of going for a walk, huh?

Finally! I'm out in the real world! No stinking fences! I'm the USS Enterprise of dogs - I must explore strange new worlds, seek out new life, and new civilizations...(Mom and I watch a lot of Star Trek.)

Time's up for today - Now I'm waiting for Mom to make her way back to the porch. As usual, she is not as fast as I am.

Mom is still poking along. I cannot open this door myself unless I put my leash down, and I am NOT putting my leash down. I never put my leash down!

Mom has to forcibly take my leash away from me...

I love my leash.

In other news, I finally, finally smell like a dog again! Mom took me to that place that made me smell bad, and I have worked very hard to get my dog smell back. It is always harder in the winter to find ways to to keep that fresh dog smell, but I am cultivating a few new spots in the backyard!

Live Long and Prosper!

Thursday, May 1, 2008

It's my birthday!

I'm nine years old today!

This picture is totally photoshopped, because you guys know how I feel about hats!

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Mom Called Me the B-Word

Mom bought me a new bone yesterday! At first, I pretended not to want it, and I played with my Baby, and sat in Mom's lap, and ignored the new bone. But I couldn't keep that up for very long.

I love rawhide bones! I chewed, and chewed, and chewed my new bone. Then I needed to go outside.

Naturally, I carried my new bone with me! But when we got to the back door, Mom said, "Drop it, Bailey." I looked at her with total incredulity - I wanted to take my bone with me! Mom just doesn't understand these things!

So, Mom told me to drop it again, and I slowly bent my head down to the floor until the bone bumped the tile, but I kept my new bone in my mouth. Mom opened the door, and I slowly strolled out on to the deck...

And when I got to the edge of the deck, Mom must have looked down at the kitchen floor, because suddenly I was busted. She said, in a really low voice, "Bailey..."

And I turned my head, and she saw the evidence. She said, very quietly, "Bad boy, Bailey. Bring me the bone." But I went out in the yard, and she just closed the door.

Well, now my feelings were hurt, because Mom never calls me the B-word. I was so upset that I didn't even do my business! I raced back in the house, but Mom had already gone back upstairs. I jumped up on the bed, and showed her the bone, and she told me I was a good boy again! Yay!

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Happy Earth Day!

Y'all know I am all about the environment. I like to help recycle the garbage, and I make sure all the flower beds in my backyard get fertilized (naturally, of course) frequently. Like, daily.

So, in honor of Earth Day, I am sharing my box recycling technique with you. Be careful, though. This is hard work, and may not be for everybody.

First, of course, I have to get the box out of the trash. Then, I take it to the middle of Mom's bed, so she can appreciate all my hard work, and praise me.

Look at how hard I have to concentrate to do this right!

This is me letting Mom know that I am done, and ready for a treat.

I give her my best smile, but I never get any treats after all this hard work.

Maybe the pieces aren't small enough. I will try harder next time.

Happy Earth Day!

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Let's Meet Piggy

You know that my favorite thing in the whole world, except for sitting in Mom's lap, is my Baby.

Remember how excited I was when I got my new duck Baby awhile back?

Well, Ducky was a great Baby, but sometimes I love my babies too much, and they fall apart! All by themselves!

When Mom came home from work one day last week, she discovered that Ducky had fallen apart - all that was left of him was his head. I put it in the middle of Mom's bed so she would be sure to notice.

Then I made sure she knew how sad I was.

I missed Ducky.

But then.on Friday, this piggy came to live with us! He is big and soft, and squeaks a lot! I love my new piggy baby!

I play with Piggy all the time! When I first get new babies, I won't go anywhere without them. You know how Mom has that dumb rule that I can't take my inside toys outside? Well, I needed to go outside Friday night, but Mom wouldn't let me take Piggy, so I decided I would stay inside instead.

About 4 hours later, I really needed to go outside, and I thought maybe Mom would forget about her dumb rule, but she didn't.
So, this time I put Baby down and hurried outside, and then raced back in to make sure Piggy was still here. Thank goodness, he was still in the kitchen, and hadn't fallen apart.

This is a picture of me in my "Baby trance." I like to just hold my babies in my mouth sometimes, and my eyes sometimes roll up a little, and Mom says I am in a trance. I don't know what that means.

This is when I threw Baby across Mom's computer.

She tried to get Baby away from me, but she couldn't.

Piggy is the best Baby ever! I know Mom wants my Piggy ... but she should just get one of her own.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

I Played a Trick on Mom!

Back when I was a baby, Mom taught me how to open the backdoor when I was finished playing outside. I'm pretty smart you know, so this was easy for me to learn. I never bothered to learn how to close the door when I come back in, though, so if Mom doesn't get up right away to close it when I open it, sometimes bugs come in, and one time a bird came in!
Sometimes when Mom has company, I surprise them by opening the backdoor all by myself - it is funny to see their faces, and then they all pat me!

Mom stayed home from work today, and has been taking a lot of pictures, and working on her computer. Whenever she stays home, I bug her a lot and ask her to let me outside over and over, so she keeps having to get up and down and up and down. She takes me to the kitchen and shows me that the door is already open, but I never go outside without her leading me right to the door! That's 'cause I always forget that I left it open....

A little while ago, I wanted to go outside again right when Mom was taking pictures. Instead of taking me to the door, she took me to the backstairs, which lead right down to the backdoor, and showed me that it was wide open, and told me to go outside. I went to the bottom of the stairs, and grabbed one of my babies, and ran out the door with it. I'm not allowed to take my babies outside, and Mom saw me and told me to drop it, but I fooled her, and ran off the deck with Baby.

Mom kept telling me to come back, but I played dumb. Sure enough, I made Mom chase me out in the backyard IN HER PAJAMAS! She never got dressed today, and now I had her chasing me in the yard in her pajamas. It was funny.

At first, I just ignored her and kept running deeper into the yard.

Then I got distracted by those workmen nextdoor (YES, they are still there!)

That allowed Mom to get pretty close to me, but I still had my eye on her!
Then I started shaking my baby and daring her to try to get me.
She got my soccer ball, and kicked it, and I dropped Baby because I thought we were going to play soccer.

Mom scooped up Baby and ran back to the house. So I guess she played a trick on me!

All I wanted was for Mom to play outside with me! I don't think she understood this game at all. I will have to try something else later today, after I take a nap.

Monday, April 7, 2008

It's been pretty quiet...

After my big coup last week, saving Mom and the whole house from that moth, I was glad to have a pretty quiet week!

Mom and I played soccer, of course. Most of you know we do that almost everyday, if it isn't raining. This is a picture of me making a big play!

Right before we started this game, Mom turned around and went back into the house to get something (she wanted to get her camera, to take some pictures of some dumb old flowers.) She told me to stay, and then she told me again, like I might forget! I had the soccer ball in my mouth, and I was so excited about playing that I wanted to make sure Mom was coming back, so I followed her, but she didn't hear me.

She has a really strict rule that I cannot take my inside toys outside, and I cannot bring my outside toys inside. I know, it is a stupid rule, but she's the boss of me, so I try very hard to follow the rules. But this time, I was too excited about soccer! Mom went all the way upstairs, and into our room, and got the camera, and when she turned around, I was standing there with the soccer ball in my mouth, and she squealed, 'cause I had snuck up on her! Then she told me to take the soccer ball outside, so we went out and played for a long time. Guess who won? Me, of course!

Mom sometimes makes me do silly tricks to earn my treats.

She taught me to balance a dog treat on my nose, and hold still, and then catch it in my mouth. I'm pretty good at it, but this time, the Cheez-It flew right up to the top of my head and landed there, and stayed! Mom laughed and laughed and laughed, 'til there were tears coming out of her eyes. I kept looking everywhere for the Cheez-It, but couldn't find it. Mom even had time to get this picture.

PS: Don't tell Mom, but I planned the whole thing - this is my newest trick, but since she laughed so hard and made fun of me, I will never do it for her again! I'd like to see her flip a Cheez-It off her nose and onto her head...

Monday, March 31, 2008

Home Invasion!

As my regular readers know, I am a very busy dog, with lots of jobs. I am basically on duty 24/7, because you never know when something's going to happen!
Last Wednesday night, Mom was working on the computer (AGAIN!), so I could not sit in her lap, so I was curled up on the bed. I had my back turned to Mom, so she would know my feelings were hurt. Mom thought I was taking a nap, but I wasn't - I suddenly lifted my head up and started growling, and staring at the ceiling.

I had seen this dangerous moth fly in and land on the ceiling, but Mom had not. I kept growling, but Mom didn't know why, and thought I heard a dog or a truck or something outside. She can be really dumb sometimes.

I finally stood up on the bed and started barking straight at the moth, and when Mom told me to "Get it," she thought I would run downstairs and take care of my business down there. I gave her a look, and got off the bed and ran to the corner and kept barking at the ceiling.

Mom looked and looked, but didn't see the giant moth. She finally got off the bed and came over to where I was, and there it was! She took the picture and sat back down to work at the computer, so I had to start barking all over again, because the moth was being all quiet and still now, but those things can be really pesky nuisances! And they taste bad, too! Mom finally got up and swatted him with a magazine, and I settled back down to my duties.

Sunday, March 23, 2008

Here's What's Going on Today

When Mom got home from class today, we went straight out to the backyard. She tried to played soccer with me, but I was much more interested in playing with my big stick! This big stick was blown down in a big storm we had over a week ago, and I have had a lot of fun with it! I like to run with it, and chew it. It is not too big for me!

I did play a little soccer with Mom, so she wouldn't be sad.

The workers are still working on the house next door. It used to be a blue house, and now it is a tan house. That is strange to me! I hope they are almost done, because I do not like them. They make a lot of noise with their tools, and throwing stuff, and when I peek through the fence at them, or when I bark and them, they talk loud to me, and one of them barks back at me. My Mom said something to him one time, 'cause he thought she was inside when he did it, but she wasn't. HA!

Remember when I told you how one of my real important jobs is to make sure Mom doesn't throw away important stuff? Well, I was super busy today while she was at class! She has had a cold, and there were a lot of tissues in the trash, and also a snack bag that still had some perfectly good crumbs in it. Wasteful, is what that is. I ate the crumbs, and then shredded everything, so it will decompose quicker at the landfill. My work is never done!